Friday, March 28, 2008

Enough is enough.

When is it going to be enough? When will we take the leap, and affirm human rights. When will we not excuse, call it what it is when we see it and say no more? How about now. Because we are tired of waiting. And because we deserve nothing less. I would ask the government, the courts, and public interest organizations for no more homophobia in the law, no more sexism in the schools, and no more racism in our halls of justice. Let us get rid of homophobic panic as a defense in the criminal law, let us include a sex and gender studies course in our high schools, and let us accept oral history for its true value in land claim cases the first time around.

Enough is enough. There are "movements" that need no longer be such. There should be pay equity in Canada by now. We should be teaching our citizens different things in their formative years. We should not stand for the genocide, misogyny, and homophobia that run rampant in this country, this society and the western world. Enough. My children, or at least my nieces and nephews, should NOT have to deal with this anymore. Be brave. Do what is right. What the world asks of us, and compels us to do.

I ask of us, citizens of the world, wage-earners of the future, middle-class canadians, we can be the generation to change the world.

Courage, fortitude, love,
Rachael

Thursday, March 27, 2008

...love, unexpectedly

What terrifying days. So many of the people I know are in the process of having to grapple with huge decisions. Often many decisions at once, which is daunting and huge. These decisions just never end...I feel like they have started, nad from now on, we will have to constantly make really important choices on a regular basis. Right now these are really big life decisions; ones that require courage and complex considerations, deliberation, mulling. It is overwhelming, but we will make it through because we have to.

Along the way it involves doing crazy things like how today I rocked a solid 13.5 hours at the Frasier Building. It seems like a lot, but there were breaks...I went for coffee once and there was a book launch that I attended for the really good food. There was smoked salmon, sushi, excellent deserts, free wine, and The Roasted Vegetable tray- any vet uvic-er will know the glory of this tray; it's pretty much the best roasted vegetables you will ever have- there is like garlic, or pesto maybe...in it, and its pretty amazing.

I am continuing to fiend Iron and Wine (the band, not to be confused with a simple lack of protien and alcohol in my diet) tonight as I unwind from the long day at the frase. It is a beautiful refuge-music, art and creative expression in general.

To all those who are working towards decisions, may you find your own refuge and fortitude where you seek it and may it offer you direction and comfort. Ultimately, beyond comfort in what I find beautiful, I find it in love. Always love. Because we need it, and because its what we've got, and its always been enough so far. And because it feels good, sometimes tugs at your heart strings, but its worth it in the end. To have loved and been loved in this world. so...I am a believer in love. I think there are many of us still around.

that's all i've got. maybe love is in my psyche from contracts this morning, but I highly doubt that K law is ever in my psyche...maybe I underestimate my love for Kilcoyne. I don't know. But love will carry us through.
Rachael
from a starry, clear, cold victorian night

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

La plage; mon refuge

In times of crises one often forgets one's most important allies.

It had been a while since I had been to the beach. I always think its such a journey. Its only 15 minutes each way, but the trek keeps me from going every day. The beach provides so many benefits, I think I should journey down, but life gets busy and one forgets.

I went twice this weekend. One night the moon was not out, and it was dark and cloudy. Tonight was so clear and the stars and constellations were out in numbers. The peaceful calm of the waves breaking against the shore has such a primitive calming effect. Sometimes when I get lost in my music, the ocean gives a more forceful thrust, and my attention becomes refocused on the shifting water. I feel deeply connected to the ocean- I thought about it when we were on the open waters in the Caribbean sea, how those dark waters were indeed intertwined with those crashing against my beach at home in Victoria.

When coupled with beauty of lights refelcting on water, the crisp smell of the ocean and cool, refreshing air, the beach is the perfect refuge from one's worldly concerns. The problem is when they follow along, infiltrate the rituals that come along with beach going. Try as I might, they follow and remind me of why the beach session was necessary.

Here I am, back at home, glass of wine in hand, a final blog entry of this trying weekend. Refreshed for now, ready for another week. On va voir.

Rach,
from a fantastic, clear, stunning, bright, starry victorian night

Saturday, March 22, 2008

Iron and Wine, you stun me.

I just listened to the most amazing song. It was the most beautiful piece of poetry meeting stunning music and having a love child that made the most incredible song you have heard.

Passing Afternoon by Iron and Wine. Wow.

Although I did not much today, I discovered this song. And sometimes that is more important, or at least more significant, in our lives that what we can produce in a day.

A collection of my favourites lines from the song:

there are things that drift away, like our endless numbered days.

Sunday pulls its children from their piles of fallen leaves.

There are sailing ships that pass, on our bodies in the grass.

Spring time calls her children till she lets them go at last.

And she's chosen where to be, (though she's lost her wedding ring).

...The night that finds us all,
Winter tucks her children in her fragile china dolls...

My hands remember hers, rolling round the shaded ferns...

...like songs I'll never learn.

It's pretty stunning. Find it, listen. It will change your day.

I'm on the lookout for new music to get me through exams. I've found some in this album for certain.

I was thinking about the role of listener, the one familiar to us as students. Everyone is always telling us information, and often we forget that we have things to add to the continuing dialogue. Our thought counts too. We all bring view points and experience that make what we have to say valuable. Every day is an expanding of my point of view, every day I learn things that broaden my understanding of the world. It can only continue. Passive listening, learning; active writing, changing. But sometimes we have to unlearn things- senses of entitlement, elitism, thing that we understand everything when we don't at all. Unlearning is usually harder than learning something, so I try to approach things with as much of an open mind as possible. I try, and often I will be asked to think where I hadn't thought before. Hard work, innovative thinking, channeling of passion, and confidence in our capabilities will get us places. Us, who will effect change, make the differences. Big and small.

It seems somehow unfiting, as I reconsidered from before, to wish a people a happy good friday, since its supposed to be the saddest day of mourning. Regardless, happy good friday to my loves who I know really did have good good fridays.

luv Rach
from a stunning bright full moon kind of victorian night

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

Experimenting with Haikus

All we have is each other.
Nothing is for certain, but believing in humanity...?
A coloured history

Though that thought had too many syllables, I was thinking about writing Haiku's today. I'm going to experiment and see what it would look like to just do ones about anything at all.

The ceramic bowl where I deposit my vapourizer remains

Red heart, blue petals
From where the sun shone, to here
Small and fragile


My piece of art created for UAWL's display at the community conference (can one do a series of haikus? I just did)

life-giving and dead
my sculpture of the classroom
as two ovaries

green trees and women
required life giving forces
green, ailve, thriving

the darkened one: black
dead are my hopes of changing
the world- at least all

I like the way you have to think of all the ways to describe something with the requisite syllables.


I wrote this a few nights ago, and clearly in my blazed state of mind, didn't manage to post it. But here it is. I should be off to study now. Happy Good Friday. Much love to the outside world.
Rach

Monday, March 17, 2008

Happy St. Patrick's Day!!

Slainte and Happy St. Patrick's Day! It's a wonderful holiday to throw away our worldly concerns and consume some green beer, sings some irish tunes and enjoy each other's company.

As we head into the madness of exams, when poeple are walking fine balances, it will be nice to have an evening of worry-free...mayhem? Maybe not...

A list seems fitting. Perhaps a series of lists.

Things you forget when you're in law school:

1. There is a life outside of the Fraser Buidling.
2. There is a life outside of our bubbles at all.
3. That not all is hopeless. Sometimes there are successes that we do not hear about. Ones that are met everyday. We forget what the chipping away does. It makes it okay for a lot of people to just exist, the battles that were fought before us. So we continue to fight those battles, with resiliency and with strength, because someone must. And because we deserve to fight. And why would we settle for anything less.
4. What a life of privilege you have lived. You made it here. And so many don't. You have a brilliant opportunity. That LLB will get you places. That knowledge is really incredible, handy if you practice and an entry point to many things.
5. What that thing called an evening off is, except for St. Pat's.

Things you may like about this law school.

1. COnferences like the community conference, and our UAWL Conference.
They were refreshing, illustrive of the challenges and opportunities that have happened in so many diverse areas, thought-provoking, awesome days.
2. Afternoon Theatre Workshops. Through interactive games and exercises, insightful guidance, and open amazing people, beautiful things were produced that day. It was one of the most rewarding, refreshing things I have done here. I remembered that I have a body and the different things for which it can be used, I had just never used it for art and sculpting before.
3. The sense of community, though you often wish to take a break from it, overall I like it. We have excellent professors, supportive staff, and we go to school with really good people.

Enough of that.

5 things I loved about Ireland

1. THe people. They are a vibrant people, enthusiastic and engaged. They always have a story and they are kind.
2. Galway. Whata beautiful little city. A cobblestone pedestrian downtown with pubs and shops gallore. The harbour and the waterfront on the River . The Claudaugh, where they speak Gaelic. That really delicious fish and chips place and that spot near the Corrib River where I would chill on the banks and read.
3. Sligo, more the county than the city. It was my home for so much of my stay. The city has character. Some really awesome pubs, like a little a hole-in-the-wall pub, literally wide enough for 2 people barely to cross, the pubs that still had booths like from way back in the day, and vibrant downtown in the day, abandoned by night.
But the surrounding area, all within 15 minutes, there was a waterfall, a lake, beaches, 2 mountains to hike, and some of the best surfing in the country (which surprisingly a lot of people enjoy), all which you can read described far better than I can in the various works of Yeats- not the surfing but all the other stuff. ....it was just naturally beautiful and a great place upon which I reflect fondly having spent a summer there.
4. The ridiculousness of Irish transportation. Why does it require that 3.5 hours to drive 200 kms? Why is there no train connecting the west side of the country? Why must the tractors drive on the highways, or the sheep travel on them, across them, etc?
5. Smithwick's beer and Bulmer's Apple Cider, free beer tours in Kilkenny, many a pint in many a place. Good music, good cheer.
6. All of my travels within- the history of Belfest, the beauty of the Aran islands, the fascination of the Giant's footsteps, the religous past of Dublin and the honesty of all the people met (when I wasn't working....lol!). From Waterford, to the Slieve League Peninsula, Cork to Donegal, Ireland you are stunning, charming, not without many problems, but a great place to have known.

Alright- happy st pat's to all my loves of life.
Enjoy wherever you are,
Rachael,
from a cold, cloudy but bright Victorian night

Monday, March 10, 2008

Fatiguee

I am utterly exhausted, yet unable to sleep. Donc je tourne ici, l'endroit dont j'oublie souvent. Le processus d'ecrire. On est ce qu'on dit. There are no accents, so english will remain the flavour of the entry.

Law school didn't get harder substantively, but the subject matters cause one to question really fundamental parts of one's self, one's decisions, and what matters really. In reading case upon case of equality charter challenges, disgusting sexual assault laws, and life, liberty and security of the person cases involving Sue Rodriguez and the right to die, and the Morgentaller decriminalization of abortion case, it takes a toll.

I'm tired. I'm tired of rhetoric, of judicial skirting, of justifications and circular reasoning. Some beauties....Do we all remember suffragette Nelly McClung? Won the vote for women circa the thirties? So she has this phenomenal grandson who becomes an Alberta Court of Appeal judge about 50 or 60 years later. He says some pretty awesome things like "When will the majority stop having to curtsey to minority rights?" and, to L'Heureux-Dube, a Supreme Court of Canada Justice whose husband committed suicide, that feminists cause male suicides or something just as horrendous to that effect. At least he wasn't a member of the Alberta legislature who specifically left sexual orientation off their Human Rights Legislation as a category of protected grounds. Huzzah Alberta!!! You've solved it. Now the gays will just disappear!

I'm tired of what matters being sacrificed for firm glamour. What did you come to law school for? To write wills for years before I decide I hate my job so much that I quit and find the job I really wanted in the first place. But I would like to eliminate the first half. So I need to remain focused for exam period; to not loose vision of the fact that these five exams can negate any prior falling behind, or answers of negligence.

I'm tired of not believing that I'm good enough to get exactly what I want. I almost censored, but its there. I am smart enough when I trust myself. Sometimes I don't come up with the answers. But no one does all the time. I want this job for the summer. I want to reseach con law, family law, questions of should, not just can. SHOULD. Should is what we should ask in federalism questions. I want to spend a summer researching the delivery of parental and maternity leave in Canada. I want there to be important papers written from it. I want it to matter and I want it to make something better. That is why I came here. To matter and to make things better. "What an idealist, people will say. Not at all: It's just that the others are scum." -Frantz Fanon said. I don't know who that is, but it comes as the signature on a girl from UAWL's emails. I feel its a bit fitting.

And so, tomorrow I have my interview. L'entrevue pese sur moi en ce moment. Mais, je suis capable. Je peux. And if all else fails I can return home to my lovely beautiful friends, curl up with them on their couches, have Sunday night girl's nights, blazing sessions at any time, and beyond that on va voir.

Rachael,
d'une claire nuit victorienne

Thursday, March 6, 2008

I survived my first moot.

Today I mooted. There was crying, there were questions, there was drilling. It was awful. I decided on the spot that that was it. I was done. And then...we finished and our judges said that we were awesome. I thought that I might not pass but instead they said really good things. They said that I was really great with my case knowledge. And that I needed to have more confidence in what I knew. That I was smarter than I think I am. I thought it was a complete train wreck, but apparently it was not.

Some friends then went to Christies. To drink beers. It was a really good choice. Fantastic really. I am done my assignments for the year and all that is left is exams. Oh my. First year law is really really really intense. What an experience.

What's my answer to my million dollar question asked by Chloe? What will I be when I grow up? A lawyer? A policy developer? A litigator (hahaha based on today)? A professor? A vagabond? No idea. And what would I like to do more of? Read fiction. Sleep. I don't really know. Traipse about the world a bit more. c'est possible.

I also had a good victoria inside evening. it was raining outside so i couldn't have a victorian night. but i did eat a brownie, or "soy protein" as the label says on the container. Its contents are wrapped in tinfoil so the child doesn't see brownie if riffling through our shared freezer and consume it and get blazed. that would be bad.

Wednesday, March 5, 2008

UVic Law Community Conference: Knowledge through Diveristy

Today I remember why I came to UVic. Today made me feel good about going here. That hasn't happened super regularly.

I went to a powerful session on trans rights with barbara findlay and Kimberly Nixon. The exercise we did at the beginning. We had to switch between target and non-target groups on either side of the room. Being on the right was comfortable, but felt guilty: the side of privilege. The left was uncomfortable but there was some solidarity being in the target group. Its amazing how comfortable stepping over the line is for things like you self identify as gay, lesbian, bi-sexual, or transgendered. Its not something that feels difficult. That is not something I would have said a year ago. Some categories were really difficult though even my toughest ones weren't as hard as others. Have you ever been called fat? seems less difficult than Have you ever been institutionalized? Have you suffered sexual or physical abuse? We learned to listen to the target group, because as members of the non-target group we know nothing. We learned to communicate to the assholes in power with respect. "We are who we say we are." Yes. Courageous strong people.

I also went to Immigration and discrimination. It was really intense to learn about the status of refugees, and especially the intersection of family and immigration law. What happens when you are a woman here with your husband-to-be, sponsored by him, and the relationship breaks down? What about the kids when they are Canadian citizens and you don't get status and you can't stay in the country?

The third session of the day was one on Labour Unions and the advancement of queer rights. I played the role of the sceptic. I was a member of a union for nearly four years, and I did not feel like it would have been okay for me to be openly gay at work. But, in terms of advancement, maybe here in BC the unions are led by individuals who are activists. But are they usually? Aren't those who are at the head of the unions older, white, heterosexual males? Why would they bother challenging the status quo that they benefit from upholding? Young people don't lead unions. Where are these activists coming from? Bavis argued that unions have the political will to protect minorities, but where is that will coming from. But unions have done good things. A lot of benefits for same sex couples were fought for and won by unions. They won things like not letting parents take their kids out of someone's class just because that teacher is gay, and letting teachers teach from material that contains same sex couples and families. Unions are well situated with the resources to bring claims. Things to think about.

Knowledge through Diversity I gained. I wish I could have been in two, often three places at once. I would have liked to have learned about a Law and Religion session around the Hijab. I want to know about climate change. Aboriginal issues. "Where are our men? We want them back!........................" (a vagina monologue named his braided hair or something to that effect). I wanted to learn more about animal rights. Migrant workers. It would have been amazing to go to all of the sessions. For nect year the only thing I would change is the ability to be in three places at once. It was awesome.

I ended the night with a beautiful session down at the beach with a friend. There may have been a mexican cigarillo involved. A beautiful night. The number of stars was amazing! It was stunning. And the water was peaceful, the air crisp, and the sky clear. Good company, good talks. Yes.

To my beautiful wonderful amazing perfect brilliant friends out there, congratulations on your respective successes. You all give me life. You inspire me. You do the important things in life. I love you.

Rach,
supra, blog entry style victorian night.

Saturday, March 1, 2008

Tulips in February. Damn I just missed posting on Feb. 29.

Wow. I cannot believe that was my last entry. Life is exponentially better than then.

Through time away from familiar spaces in the sun, and spaces of soul renewing days spent among my loves of life, I feel restored and ready to tackle this half of the semester. The home stretch.

In addition, I had a fabulous week back. The weather had been simply amazing. warm days everyday, with sun often, and pleasant evenings have graced us for the past week. On my walk today, there were tulips blooming. Wonderful.

Also, this week I went to the Vagina Monologues. It was a fantastic production. I laughed, I cried, I bought a t-shit proclaiming. I heart vagina. GC was in it and she was wonderful. I left feeling warm and fuzzy inside. I went with good friends and it was really nice. It was empowering and beautiful. Special notes go the performaces of My Vagina is angry, Vagina workshop, My Short Skirt, and of course the Woman who liked to make women moan. Amazing. Inspiring. Wonderful. It was preceded by a trip to Noodle Box, which is never a poor way to begin the evening. Yum!

Tonight I went to see the Lawyers on Stage production of "I love you, You're perfect, Now change!". While it did not challenge gender norms like my earlier live theatre event of the week, it was a great production that a lot of people worked very hard to put together. Every one did a fantastic job, especially those who were coughing up blood earlier in the day. Congratulations to all involved.

A lovely week back, and good things happening to good people who deserve them all around me. Much much love to those here and in London, and abroad.
Rach